Construction Zone

April 1st- Colossians 2:9-10 I am complete in Christ.
April 2nd Hebrew 4:14-16 I have direct access to the throne of grace through Jesus Christ.
April 3rd Romans 8:28 I am assured that God works for my good in all circumstances.
April 4th Romans 8:31-39 I am free from any condemnation brought against me and I cannot be separated from the love of God.
April 5th 2Tim 1:7 I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind.

these past weeks there have been many things going through me that - well I am not sure if they relate to this makeup fast directly or not-

I have been in some what of a spiritual slump- a dessert of sorts and I couldn't figure out why- well still can't- but i found myself angry like i expected God to talk to me every day or give me joy- I mean come on I'm giving up makeup- It has been extremely frustrating- but I have realized that this fast has caused me to seek more- to look for his assurance -which makes his silence all the more frustrating...

I was in a frustrated mood- and when I am stressed or have extra emotions I take a walk or a run- as i was walking the day was unusually warm and the sun was just setting - I was on a street which normally has many cars but for a split second it was silent- peaceful "this is what I want to give you"
"what?"
but there was nothing else- my mind started wheeling- this whole time I have not just been- I go about talking and talking expecting God to interrupt- when sometimes we need to just be still and listen- relaxing and experiencing peace-

I have started to listen- and with peace has come unsettledness in other areas of my life that I see God working on- that is hard- to have some many areas pointed out as needing repair... but I guess once again its like having a house that looks nice on the outside- in fact it has a new coat of paint- but on the inside there are termites eating at things and mold under the carpets- you can only ignore problems for so long- this house is going under reconstruction- caution I'm liable to crash at any moment.

so- yes its hard- but I challenge you to be silent and just listen....